I'm happy to announce that, when I build and open my own personal rock stadium, I've found the opening act: DRAINED. While the crowd at Smitty's on this night was decent sized and very receptive and energetic, Drained belong - and deserve - to be playing in front of 10 times as many people.

I don't know if Drained was named for the feeling the guys in the band have after exhausting every ounce of energy they have during their shows, or the feeling that their fans have after getting their butts kicked by this high power quartet, but it could apply to either.

Drained take the stage and propel the crowd through a set like Gene Hackman chasing the el through Brooklyn in The French Connection (if this reference makes no sense, try substituting "like Vin Diesel chasing the train through Los Angeles in The Fast and the Furious").

Stomping that gas pedal is one of the best frontmen around. He has the uncanny ability to engage the whole audience and the individuals all at once. Pausing to catch his breath only between songs, the frenetic pace sustains through every song and spreads an energy through the crowd, prompting those who know the words to scream along (and thus make frequent guest-vocal appearances). Drained encourages the crowd towards mayhem, and they let their aggression out by executing the standard moshing maneuvers. In fact, if you had a list of the most popular moshpit moves - floor punches, windmills, picking up change, drunk guy who doesn't belong there picking a fight - the Drained crowd would have it all checked off in no time!

Despite the mayhem, Drained appears to care for the safety of both the members of the audience, and for what's left of the hardcore scene.

It's a double-edged sword: You want to whip the crowd into a frenzy, but not get anyone seriously hurt. You want the crowd to be crazed enough to blow the roof off the joint, without them actually causing any property damage to one of the few clubs in the area that a band like yours can play. It's a conundrum that has discouraged many a band and closed many a club. It requires the band to, ironically, be sensible about the very chaos they are creating. Call it moshing etiquette, self-preservation- whatever - the point is that Drained teeters on that edge, but know when to pull back.

So, go see Drained because they kick A! (but cause neither serious injuries nor significant property damage, so if you're a club owner, please keep booking them).

Now, back to my own personal rock stadium. There wouldn't be any seats. It would have a rubber floor and padded walls. Nurses would be standing by just in case.

Hmmm...sounds kind of like an insane asylum.

(In my best Michael Buffer voice) "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the opening night of THE ASYLUM!!! Now for your pleasure...and your pain: DRRRRRRRAINED!!!"

Yeah, I like the sound of that.